What would girls die for?

Guys. Metaphorically, of course.

Of the many many pleasures in life - beauty, clothes, shoes, bags; Girls will also sacrifice anything for their guy and it always made me wonder why. Although I wonder, I'm just one of them. Well, at least the many girlfriends I know are like that =) Four or three words. The power of love or Love is blind? Or its neither. It is just our nature for being angelic and its okay, no matter what. I decided that it is just girls and emotions. Its automatic. However, it could be very subjective and this is just one side of the coin. And I wonder if guys really do appreciate it (well, if you do, then its awesome!!).

If we open the newspapers these days, there are so many cases of teenage girls running away with their so-called bf. Why so stupid? It is not worth while to just run away from school and follow somebody who they barely even know..Not this kinda sacrifice. I will probably give my sympathy to those who were cast black magic on, but not those who know men/guys through Facebook and get cheated. Hmmm...its like a trend these days. I don't know whats behind - family probs, stress etc. but its just not the way. I hope we can do something about it.

ps: The power of love lies with whoever who cares less.

Valentines Day

Happy Valentines Day!!...May all enjoy this auspicious day =)

Everyday's a V-day, some say. To some, it sounds unromantic. To others, it may be acceptable. To florists and restaurateurs it is absolutely a bad thing. hahaha.

Its been quite some time since I've scribbled here. So here's a lil' something.

It is 2011 now, but I've not post my 2010 wrap-up. I'll try, when my mood comes. I kept reminiscing December since the start of the year and hence the title of my song. Oh Darn! Am I moving backwards? But December was one of my best months last year. If I could, I would have stayed in the memory.

Coming back to reality. Lets see whats coming.

2 months to completion of FYP. Relief.

3 months to leaving Uni. Yeay!

3 1/2 months to going through a new test : The distance. Hmm..

At this point, I find life to be weird. haha.. However colorful it was back then, I don't know whats lying ahead of me. It seems blank even if I have a plan. Ahh, my wishful thinking.

I just wish that everything goes smoothly this year.

Crisp breeze

Feeling the cold wind outside chills my spine and dampens my body but it never fail to activate my mind. And today, I'd like to share a lot of things. It could be a very random, long post. So, please, be patient with me.

I'm back on my own legs - living without a car at the moment. Its good that I can actually compensate all my missed work outs but it is a terrible thing that my freedom is restricted. No more lone-ranger outing at McDs whenever I want to =( Why isn't there a Starbucks in Uni? or a McD kiosk? or Subway Sandwiches? or....something that can kill my boredom and distract myself from being in my own world.

The most annoying. People begin to get addicted with Fb while I'm beginning to dislike it. I think its because of the recent events that I find it annoying. I think the objectives of Fb has been achieved beyond that it is starting to give all the negative effects. If guys like browsing pictures of pretty/sexy ladies and girls like posting pictures to attract attention, well, maybe it is still acceptable. But cheating behind your other half's back by sending sweet mails/messages through fb to other people? C'mon...Ever thought of how your other half will feel if he/she reads it?..Think about it. *I feel for you to those who been through that. Stay strong!*

Updates. Another 3 weeks to a 3 week study break! But before all the fun, I'll first have to go through many restless nights. I must say that juggling between time, studies & activities as well as my own life hasn't been easy, but the one thing I'm amazed is that I always go through it well. I hope I could make it too this time. I should be a juggler!hehe. With all the projects, assignments, presentations - all due soon, I'm most worried with my FYP 1 presentation next week. Having Dr. Kok as my panel is so alarming. Famous for asking lots of questions, I'm afraid I'll be standing there dumbfounded! while having Dr. Goh as my supervisor, I'd say, thumbs up! haha. By the way, they're both best friends. ;)

Dean list. finally..The one thing that I'm waiting for to achieve again. I'm back on the list last semester. Am contented =) and I'm so lucky to get a hamper today. ^^ Thanx to mum, dad and joon aun and of course, myself for the never-ending support. Pictures up soon.

I've got more to say, unfortunately, I've got to go now. Tedious maze set up tonight! I'll write again soon!

My best friend just wouldn't leave me alone

Glad that I'm not the only abnormal one, but ain't proud of myself too. I found out that some people face the same problem too.

One of my best friend is actually my sleeping problem. Usually it'll visit me a week before holiday ends. Thats the time when I hardly sleep at night, I begin to get nervous and..even if I'm asleep, subconsciously I'm awake at times. Oh when I'm back in uni, I won't be able to sleep well too.. It'll prolong for a few days to a week until I had enough of it.

3 1/2 years, nothing's changed except this time, instead of a week, I didn't sleep well 2 nights before I had to come back.. Should I say its an improvement? haha.. but i find it a little too late, because, its my second last term already.

Maybe, its all in the mind. hahaha

A Garden View Deluxe

The title sounds nice, not the content.

All my 3 years, I've never faced any problems with my roomies. I dare say it was heaven living with Joo, Tai, Ye-Ne and Rachel. At least we all have the basic manners - switching off the main lights when others are sleeping, keeping our voices down, putting our phones into silent mode etc etc.. Hence, we lived very peacefully.

Little would I expect to meet a whole new bunch of roomies on a crucial semester and really, they're hmm...inconsiderate. It is a total opposite. Maybe because they're younger? Thats a lame excuse, I tell you. The beginning of the semester is the best time to have great sleep, I usually hit the bed by midnight but haha I guess not this time. Two weeks into the semester and I've never slept well yet. Luckily I have quite a flexible timetable, I could slee.p more in the day but thats just not my best way out.

xxx

Plus, the horrifying room location. The presence of slimy creatures off and on - outside, in the toilet..its freaking me out. Having impolite services from the hostel officers..I just hate them. Being sarcastic when you're just a hostel staff.. Hey, you people should think twice.

Ps: I think I'll fail my not-going-back-every-other-weekend plan. I'm depressed.

Home

I cannot stay put in this place for more than 3 weeks, I'll miss home terribly and thats what I'm feeling the whole week. I know why Cyn wants to go home some much. I feel you today. No worries, you'll be home soon for good.

**How I wish the April fool prank I played wasn't a prank and I really could drop by there.

Why?...

Why does Monday come before Tuesday ?

Why do summers start in June ?

Why do winters come too soon ?

Why do people fall in love,

When they're always breaking up ?

Oh why ?

Why do we love if love will die ?

Why does Wednesday come after Tuesday ?

Why do flowers come in May ?

Why does springtime go away ?

Why do people fall in love,

When they're always breaking up ?

Oh why ?

Why do I love you ? Tell me why

It's not like I can't explain what's in my heart

It's just I feel a crazy pain when we're apart

I don't wanna breathe

I don't wanna think

I don't wanna love

I don't wanna do anything

It's not like I can't describe what's going on

It's just I feel I'm not alive when you're not home

I don't wanna sleep

I don't wanna dream

I just want you here beside me

Without you there's no me

Why does Monday come before Tuesday ?

Why do summers start in June ?

Why do winters come too soon ?

Why do people fall in love

When they're always breaking up ?

Oh why ? (why ?)

Why do we love if love will die ?

Why does Wednesday come after Tuesday ?

Why do flowers come in May ?

Why does springtime go away ?

Why do people fall in love,

When they're always breaking up ?

(oh why ?, why ?)

Why do I love you ?

Tell me why

It's not like I can't escape what's in my soul

'Cause with you inside my heart,

Where can I go ?

I don't wanna see

No you without me

I can't go through life without you

Without you, there's no me

Why does Monday (does Monday) come before Tuesday ? (before Tuesday)

Why do summers start in June ?

Why do winters come too soon ?

Why do people fall in love

When they're always breaking up ?

Oh why ? (why, why, why ?)

Why do we love if love will die ? (why, why)

Why do the rivers flow to the sea ?

If rivers flow, why can't your love flow through me, babe ?

Why does my heart, uuh, feel so missed ?

To be in love

To feel in love

Why don't I feel complete ?

Why does Monday (does Monday) come before Tuesday ? (before Tuesday)

Why do summers start in June ?

Why do winters come too soon ?

Why do people fall in love,

When they're always breaking up ?

Oh why ? (why ?),( why ?), (why ?)

Why do we love if love will die ? (will die, will die)

Why does Wednesday (does Wednesday) come after Tuesday ? (after Tuesday)

Why do flowers come in May ?

Why does springtime go away ?

Why do people fall in love, (all the time)

When they're always breaking up ?

Oh why ? (why ?)

Why do I love you ? Tell me why

Tell me why ? (why ?)

Tell me why ?

Tell me why ? (why?)

Tell me why ?

Lead vocals by T.J. Jackson, Taryll Jackson and Taj Jackson

Background vocals by Michael Jackson and 3T

Drifted away

The awful drink

Today is FT day and the last time I got to enjoy this holiday was 3 years back. I remembered very well that I spent half a day in Telecom museum browsing through whatever they have in the archive. Pretty interesting. If you have the time, probably just drop by yeah. Looking at the development of our communication system from time to time could interest you a little.

So, January was a roller coaster ride for me.

It seems that the new year kicked start unexpectedly terrible but I'm glad at the same time. I know, I know its very contradicting and hey guess what, I have not decided on my resolutions yet. Maybe I still want to continue enjoying the bits and pieces of 2009. How sad.

I admit I got so drifted away during the January weekends and I also stirred up some anger and discomfort in my loved ones...Guess they were so worried. The guilt has been with me though and all the while I've been trying a little too hard to keep my mind from being too preoccupied, but of course, to no avail.

Well, I'm glad January's gone and things have eased a little, I think.

I'll remember the days because I wouldn't want to go through it again and there's no one to blame.

Apologies to the people I love and who loves me.

~Try looking at things from a new perspective~

Mourn for the Ruler

Am I being conservative, open-minded, modernized, weird or ms. nice citizen[just kidding]?

I think mourning for the ruler isn't a big deal, to me its a form of respect. Well, I don't go all out and put on the black band, but I wear dark-coloured clothes and like Darurat has it in yesteryears, I don't walk out of the university grounds during mourning hours. Just in case. :)

Mourning for the Sultan of Johor who has just passed away last week has been an issue. In fact, its the hottest issue in the university this week. On Monday morning, the university came out with a memo urging all staff and students to mourn for the ruler of the state. On Tuesday morning, they enforced the rule and the guards were checking thoroughly - car after car that passed through the gate. They gave warnings to those who did not abide by the rule.

Some people argued with the guards because according to the newspapers, it is NOT compulsory to mourn and there will not be any fines or summons. Obviously, its no use complaining to the guards because they just carry out their duties upon receiving orders.

I don't get the flow. Seriously, I don't. I don't get why is it a fuss among the Chinese community. Its just a black band, it has got nothing to do with religion, you're not really mourning, its just a form of respect to the dead and I guess there's no pantang larangs. Or am I missing something here?

Although we're not Johorians, we should probably just follow the rule because we've been living here for 3 years, though not wholly but since we're here, might as well abide by the rules[which I usually don't] to avoid getting into trouble yourself. Anyway, there's only 3 more days to go.. Why do you want to make a fuss with the dead person?

Another alternative, don't leave/enter the university grounds from 7am to 7pm. You'll be safer that way. hahaha..Or to save your butts, just wear it when you pass through the gate and take it off after that.

The best part is, all these complains are coming from Johorians themselves and people who comes from states which have Sultan. ;)

Financial woes

Just yesterday, I took some time off for myself to reflect what I've been doing lately. To be honest, it wasn't the usual me. After 2 Saturdays of partying, yea no doubt it was fun, but I couldn't get away from my troubles so easily. Unfortunately, I still have to face the reality. Yesterday was D day. I sat on the concrete outside my room, plugged in my MP3 player and just relax. Feel the breeze and stare at the sky. For that period of time, I was totally in my own world. Believe it or not, I sat there watching the clear sky turned into orangy horizon till it became all dark.

Images from past went through my mind, one by one. It appeared like mini TV screens and all those were quite recent ones, probably dated back till december 2009. I paused at one of the image - two weeks ago at my hairdresser's. Reflected, and the topic was about financial woes in a relationship.

She shared her experience with us which I assume its about 20 years back. She said all was good with her husband, lovey dovey and all sorts until she gave birth to her first child. Problem begins, they argued everyday. The cause of it? Money - milk powder, diapers and the like.

Its common, but at the same time, it struck me.

Its something which shouldn't happen. You didn't sign the papers to argue over financial status. You didn't sign the papers to argue everyday over small matters. Instead, it should be worked out properly by the couple way before the kid is born.

Financial woes, if not properly managed, is definitely a problem between couples, whether its new or established. As a result of the current financial crisis, couples are finding themselves between a rock and a hard place in countless instances. Many are also finding themselves with the added stress of unhappy relationship. Their financial woes push them toward separation, however, their financial difficulties prevent them, in their mind from calling it quits.

This is what American couples are facing - relationships fall out due to the increasing financial difficulties. (as of 2008)

Here are some tips which can help stop fighting over finance and enjoy a more rewarding and stress-free relationship (provided by associated content):-

• Understand that money is not the only issue. Financial fracases usually involve more complex and deeper issues than money. Security, control, and power are all underlying themes when it comes to fights over finances. When money is tight, security is a very real issue, and can lead to irritations and complaints. Control and power are closely related. Ideas of who should make the decisions, or one partner constantly making purchases without consulting with the other lead to struggles over control and turn money into the currency of familial power.

• Talk about financial issues. Just as any other aspect of a relationship requires communication, money matters need talking about. It is important to air your fears and hopes, as well as articulate your strengths and weaknesses with money. You should also listen to your partner and try to understand where he or she is coming from. Talk about the underlying issues that increase your financial struggles, and try to figure out, together, how to overcome these struggles. These communications should be calm in nature, and you should do as much listening as talking.

• Create some rules. Rules establish order and often provide comfort, whether we like to admit it or not. When you set rules for spending, however, you should understand that each party will have to give in some, and that compromise is necessary.

• Set common goals. Just having rules is not enough. You can increase your financial harmony by working toward common money dreams. Working together to reach goals can help you to feel more connected, and more like partners. The goals should be short term, medium term, and long term. Short-term goals like saving a little each month for a movie night or dining out give immediate rewards and are encouraging. Medium-range goals like saving up for family vacation, a new car, or a home down payment keep you focused on a reward and brings you together with mutual sacrifice. Long-term goals include things like retirement savings and making plans for when the kids are out of the house. This provides something for you to look forward to as a couple as long as you are together. **Applies to established relationship.

Couples, on the whole, shouldn't feel tied to their relationship because of their financial circumstances. Their emotional wellbeing doesn't have to plummet in line with the stock market. Well, I hope this little tip here helps whoever who's going through these problems. Good luck!

ps: I wonder what happens to leading a simple life...Wonder if its erased from your dictionary ;)

A cowardly act

I received a text from a friend yesterday and it goes something like this:-

"Suan...I'm kinda messed up currently, almost hook up with a girl.. but when she's ready, I feel like I'm not good enough for her. Am I very bad?"

Reading it blew my top and I chided him immediately. Due to current emotional status, its a real bad time to tell me things like this - I'll just spank the person if I could. First of all, yes, its very bad and cruel.

Okay, so this is just another typical scenario thats happening everywhere. Well, it all started off with a guy liking a girl but afraid that she doesn't fancy him the same way. To speed up a little, courtship begins and after awhile the girl fell right through it. While she's waiting for the guy to pop the question, the guy suddenly backs off. SOME guys just enjoy doing this, while SOME probably are afraid of committing in a relationship. Yes, I used the word SOME simply because I know not all guys are the same, and there's no need for me to humiliate the male population.

Sheer nonsense!!

It is not up to you to say/judge whether you are good enough for her or deserve her instead it is a decision by both souls. Maybe you're trying to be macho, wants to make the best decision but mind you, its just a cowardly act. Plus, you'll leave her in misery. Now, tell me how gentleman would it be to create such knotty situation?

**As a matter of fact, I know there are girls who leave guys in misery just like the above situation, but just so you know I don't want to mention it in there because it'll spoil part of my purpose..to promote NeYo's album here as well. hehe.

Listen to

Year of the gentleman

Be a gentleman and do respect women :)

Ps: This post is written in general and not to insult anyone.

I'm not an item.

I realized I'm just a thing to some people.

I'm not an icon, which you can use for the econs project;

I'm not here for you to create some stories and laugh about;

I'm not here for you to spread rumours;

and

I'm not a thing you can come to and go whenever you favour.

I don't voice out, doesn't mean I don't mind, doesn't mean I'm not hurt.

Respect me, guys.